Jogging outside is my go to cardio. It is something about the feeling of the fresh air hitting my face and the rhythm I hear as my feet hit the ground. I could go on forever if I wanted to but we all know that I can’t run forever.
I love the movie Forest Gump. There is a scene in the movie where Forest just decided to start running. He simply ran because he felt like it. Others joined him and this became a movement. Then there came a point where he decided to stop. He gave no explanation to why he stopped. He just stopped.
I can relate to Forest in that scene. One day I decided to run too. I picked up my life in Alabama and moved back to Atlanta my hometown and took off running. As Forest Gump said “I just felt like running”
Most people don’t want to admit that part when they run away from their call or purpose in life but it is true. I wanted to run away because I was getting too close to who I thought God was calling me to be. My life was too boring. I was too saved and I was lonely. I was sick of being perfect. I was sick of people looking up to me and I was sick of doing so much in church.
There is always justification of why we run in the moment. My reasonings were the need to be closer to family and to make more money. Both happened but that was my cover up. I believe it was my appointed time to come back home but I still made a choice to run away spiritually.
While on the run I turned up again, I stopped being abstinent, I stopped using my gifts for God, I spent less time with God, I dated and enjoyed being a single woman in Atlanta, I focused on making money only, and I picked up so many old bad habits. This is just to name a few things I did while on the run. I was enjoying my run and others ran with me. I enjoyed the path I was on and made excuses. My biggest excuses were running helps me stop trying to being perfect all the time and I’m finally free. I even got a tattoo during this time that says freedom. I was freely doing what I wanted to do and justifying it.
But recently I made the choice to just stop running. I moved back home a little over 5 years ago. I just decided to stop running in May of this year. Just like Forest Gump decided to stop running, I did the same.
Being a preachers kid and someone that was fully involved in my faith journey in the past, I could attend church and pretend like everything was alright. Deep down inside I knew that it was not and I was tired of running. Running for an extended period of time is tiring. I was tired of running and making excuses for doing so.
I just had to stop running. It had to take accountability for me running away and allow God to do the rest. Now walking in my purpose feels so much better and I don’t want to run away from it. I just decided to stop running…
Lisa Sophia 